How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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