i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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