So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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