I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
