i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize