Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
