we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize