Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
