You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You're earring is so big in my mouth
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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