i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
