the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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