That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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