haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
