Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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