actually, I'm a sock model
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
