So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
