Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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