i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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