took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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