hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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