Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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