Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
