You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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