I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
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