He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
