drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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