My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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