we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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