she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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