Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
