you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
