you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
