Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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