If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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