i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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