I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
