I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
