you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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