One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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