I wish I could teleport
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
