HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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