its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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