we're chasing vodka with high fives
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
