Your tits are I can't wait for
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
