And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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