Need sex. Gaining weight.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
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