you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
