Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
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she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
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Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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