that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Randomize
