halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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