I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Success! We fucked roommates!
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